Dear …,
i want to tell you that i don’t love you anymore. about a week ago i was soooooo disappointed of you. you know why. i’m not going to tell you this long story. you know what you’ve done to me. you know how you’ve broken my heart and you know how i missed you. i think it was all you wanted. i’m sorry but i can’t love you anymore. maybe i was the only one in the world who loved you til that day and who also knew you sooooooooo well. i loved you the way you were cuz i thought you felt a little respect to me at least. but then something happened and you know it better than me that i realized that you don’t care and that love that you showed to me was soooooo fake. you just did it cuz you knew that i loved you and that i was able to help you in every minute.
you’re so talented. you make professional lies. remember, i know you for a very long time and i know every word you think. you can’t fool me anymore. be a little careful. or maybe you can lie to those girls who are crazy bout you.
you’re not like other guys. you were sooooooo different. maybe that’s why i loved you. you were the biggest mistake i’ve made in my life. you were the biggest lesson i’ve learned. thanks.
we’ll meet again one day. will you be down on your knees? i know one day you’ll understand what you’ve lost. it will be too late, sweetie. it’s too late already. imagine, it was your last chance to bring back my love but you ignored me, you didn’t care of me. i know, i know, you’ll say you don’t care of my love, you don’t need me. that’s ok. one day you’ll surely understand the value of it.
i’m sure you’ll read this. i’m sure you’ll read this without feeling ANYTHING. you’re unable to feel. you’ll read this and go to your work or maybe you won’t even read as i made it too large and too boring. oh, whatever happens, remember that noone has ever loved you as i did before.

someone that you know,
Byurie

Blowin’ in the Wind

How many roads must a man walk down,
Before you call him a man?
How many seas must a white dove sail,
Before she sleeps in the sand?
How many times must cannonballs fly,
Before they’re forever banned?

The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind
The answer is blowin’ in the wind

How many years can a mountain exist,
Before it’s washed to the seas
How many years can some people exist,
Before they’re allowed to be free?
How many times can a man turn his head,
Pretend that he just doesn’t see?

The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind
The answer is blowin’ in the wind.

Yes and how many times must a man look up,
Before he can see the sky?
Yes and how many ears must one man have,
Before he can hear people cry?
Yes and how many deaths will it take till he knows
That too many people have died?
The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind
The answer is blowin’ in the wind

i should’ve learned it from my past. i shouldn’t have trusted him again. but i’m too stupid. all i have to do now is to sit down and cry and regret that i trusted him again. why don’t i understand? he doesn’t care about me! i know he doesn’t. and every single word is enough for me to love him again. and i need 3 months to stop loving him. how long am i going to suffer? he doesn’t deserve it! i may be the worst girl in the world but still… he doesn’t deserve all thos that he took from me. i hate him sooooooooooooo much….. and i love him sooooooooooooooo much!!!!

random thoughts

another sunday afternoon. woke up about half an hour ago. i’m planning my day now. have to finish my bioethics report today. it must be ready by thursday so i don’t have time at all. i have a lot of work to do til thursday. this is my last free day til new year. TIL NEW YEAR.
this is my last free weekend. that’s why i decided to see some of my friends yesterday. we had a great time as always.
yeah, also i made a bday card for Tatevik. i really like it. it has the colors of a sunset and in at the center is a photo of a real sunset that i made myself. inside it there are autumn leaves and also a short message for her. i hope she’ll like it too.
i forgot to tell how i met Tatevik at last! i told her to come near our uni at 3pm and that she shouldn’t be late even a second. and that she has to recognize me – i’m not going to tell her it’s me. yeah, while i was getting there, she saw me and smiled. we took a taxi and went straight to the mental hospital. she didn’t know where we were going at first but one of my classmates that was with us, was talking on her mobile and told that she’s going to the mental hospital.
the psychology class was great, though i was the only one who knew the lesson. my teacher is amazing! maybe that’s why i like the subject.
after the class we dedcided to walk. we walked from the mental hospital to the square of republic and then from there we walked to opera. i thought we had walked a lot but no! it was just 1.5 hours. i was tired like hell then…

oh, i’m tired of net. all my chat friends aren’t online anymore. where are they? i use the msn messenger very rarely. no new e-mails in my mailbox. maybe i should go back to my real life, to my real friends.

Զայրույթով և ուրախությամբ լեցուն մի օր: Անակնկալներով լի օր… Ուրբաթ… Աշնան վերջի օր: Մի օր, երբ ես մտածում էի՝ աշնան վերջին տերևը կընկնի: Ընկավ: Ուղիղ իմ գլխին: Իմ անցյալի մի կտորը… Նորից վերադարձավ: Եվ դեռ չի ցավում: Հուսով եմ՝ չի ցավեցնի: Եվ աշունը դեռ չի վերջացել: Իսկ սա նոր աշուն չէ: Սկսվել է անցյալ տարի, երբ մտածում էի, թե վերջացել է: Եվ նրան սիրում եմ դեռ…

hey, i have a new stupid poem here!!!!

i want to write this poem
i want to share my thoughts
i want to tell the world
that it’s not my fault
that i’m who i am
that you’re who you are

i want to sing this song
i want to look inside myself
i want to show you again
who i was before
and how did you see me
how did you hate me

i want to write again
i want to talk about you
i want you to know
those pages were for you
those tears were for you
but you didn’t deserve them

i want to leave you here
i want to fly away
i want to kill my past
that’s still in my heart
that’s nothing but
an endless pain

and i want again
i want something more
i want to change my world
i want to love you like
i loved you long ago
but since it’s not for me
since i’m who i am
since you’re who you are
since i can’t be you
since you can’t be me
i prefer to say goodbye

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it’s cold and dark outside. it was raining some hours ago. i’m drinking my evening hot tea and listening to norah jones.
i love rain…
after the anatomy lecture… we had to go to the foreign languages department which was in another building. and it was raining cats and dogs. nobody dared to go out so everyone were standing at the door. “what are we going to do?” maria asked. “i know,” i said and took her hand. i pulled her out from the crowd. so we were near the door. i opened the door and… we were out… fresh air, the smell of the rain, empty streets. i was walking soooooo slowly. “hey, are you crazy? hurry!” said maria. “leave me. i like rain. you may run if you want,” i said. and she left me. i walked so slowly to the other building. i was looking at the sky while i was walking. i love rain… my tears… that washed my face last night. last night… it was the moment that i realized i was more adult than i thought before… and i cried. and the sky was crying with me… people… once more my classmates thought i’m crazy… yeah, i am… just because i’m not like them… just because i think of someone else’s happiness sometimes… just because i’ve grown up too early… and norah… she sings for me…..

Կարուսել

Ոչ վե՛րջ կա, ոչ ըսկի՛զբ այս երգում

Byurakn

Writer

Անձնական տարածք

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