lazy 😛
and homeworks…
i’ve noticed that i don’t share much with my journals lately. is it the fear of so many readers? hell no… ok, my LJ has many readers and most of them are my friends. what about my real journal which i was used to open almost everyday? and now? i remember it once a week, i open it and write some stupid sentences. omg, i think i’m not able to think anymore. bad… TOO BAD… hm, i’d better go back to my homeworks.

end of the week again

oh, how i love fridays!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
this feeling… no homeworks for tomorrow, no wake up early. just do whatever you want!!!!
i’m alone at home. it’s greaaaaaat!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i want to think about the week that just passed. it was a wonderful week. probably the best one since the 1st of sept. at first, there were no classes on monday and tuesday. then… i fell in love again and it’s soooooooooooooooooo amazing!!!!! the world looks sooooooo bright!!!! also, i went to a theatre and it was great, too sad though. i went to ifes yesterday. i know that i’ve found my place in this messy world. i ifes people are so cool. i feel great when i’m with them.
and a party today. well, it could be better for me but i was too tired as i had a hard week and a hard day (yeah, i’ve done a lot besides my studies).
and another party for tomorrow!!!! have a nice day byurie…
hey, let’s think a little. it seems that i’ve switched off my mind recently. ok… what are you thinking about? yeah, i want something new, something amazing. i want a surprise. oh, what about tatevik? i was going to make a surprise for her and i haven’t done it yet. well, i have to find out when do her classes start and when finish. it’s not easy but i hope i’ll do it.
listening to alannah myles – do you really want to know me. i love this song. it’s kind of what i’m thinking about right now.
Do you really wanna know me, do you care what’s inside
Can you ever really show me there’s no secrets I must hide
If I bare my soul, can you accept it all
My darkest corner’s safe behind a wall
Do you really wanna know me at all
I can’t accept the pain, my brain screams like a runaway train
Trying to keep my heart on track
The embers turned to flame and I want you back
But I can’t trust a memory, can’t trust a memory
Oh, I can’t trust me
Do you really wanna know me, do you know what makes me smile
Can you ever really promise me this time it’s not a lie
I’ll believe it’s true when you’re standin’ at my door
I’m always here for you and I’ll open it once more
Do you really wanna know me
Do you really wanna know me
Do you really wanna know me at all

hey, you, i love you but do you really wanna know me? remember? that night… i told you you don’t know me and that’s true…..

Protected: my new love

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Protected: a letter

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i was walking to uni in the morning. the autumn sun, the clouds, the breeze… they reminded of him so much. everything. where’s he? what’s he doing? does he need me? i needed him at that moment so much. oh, stupid me. how didn’t i guess? he has forgotten me… HE HAS FORGOTTEN ME…

it’s more than 2 months i haven’t seen him. more than 2 months i haven’t felt his breath.
not in contact, not a letter…
not an email… he didn’t reply to my last email which i sent about a month ago. not a phone call… i’m not going to call him as i’m not going to be the only one who thinks about our so-called friendship.
where’s he? haven’t heard from him after the last email i received from him. it’s so weird. i noticed it yesterday. i hadn’t heard from him for ages and i didn’t even care about it. does he care? does he think about me? does he miss me? what’s he doing now? and he told me that he’s going to save our friendship, our amazing friendship.
yeah, it was yesterday… this autumn… it reminds me of him soooo much… it was a year ago that i loved him more than ever. it was a year ago that i hated him more than ever. and i wanted to see him suddenly. i was curious. 2 months are too much for not seeing each other. i can’t remember any other 2 months without seeing him (except from the time i was in paris). yeah, and i remembered… all those wonderful moments… i wanted to bring them back. it was last october… we were walking together. i had a feeling that i had never had before. it was like i was going to fall. it was like i was his only friend and he needed me. i needed him even more. holding each other’s hands… i remember every moment of that wonderful hour, one hour. yeah, i remember all those things that were wonderful.
do i still love him? no, i love the love i had before. i miss that love, i don’t miss him. there was noone so wonderful like him. i was too stupid for understanding it earlier, before losing any contact with him.

i’m bjork

hahaha, i’m bjork though i’m all that alanis has made me. lol.

Which Rock Chick Are You?

omg, friday… i update my journal once a week. poor me. and not just studies (2 subjects i still like – physiology and psychology). may i tell you everything i do during the week and the weekend? ok, here we are
everyday – drama club. we’re going to have a new play (yay!) so we’re going to practice everyday.
tuesday – the meeting of our faculty council. to be honest, i pretend that i don’t like our new president so i try to disturb him during the meeting, hehe.
thursday – small group of medical students meets in ifes.
thursday – medicus (our newspaper)… hm, we have a meeting on that day. my articles are ready so i have nothing to worry about.
friday – dear byurie, come home from the mental hospital and then you’re not able to do anything else
saturday – have to work on my reports.
and also happy way of life… it’s quite hard to work with children. no, i’m not going to be a teacher. how hard is their work!!! i felt it on my own skin yesterday. i tried to be nice to them, i tried to be angry, i tried to be worried. nothing helped. they were still screaming and screaming. then i remembered the psychology lecturer last week. poor girl!!! we were about 150 students and how noisy we were!!! i was sitting in the front row and i was listening to her but i was noisy whenever i wanted. she was just a metre away from me but even when i was quite, couldn’t hear anything though she was talking with a mic. she’s a nice girl i think. we had the same lecture today and again it was very noisy. hm, maybe a little less cuz there were about 40 people today. well, only 3 of that 40 were interested in psychology. the others were talking and i wonder on what topic.


friday again… pretty tired and a little time to rest. i’m going to be busy this weekend. well, it’s not important. there’s something more important i’d like to write.
my pen pal, Tatevik wasn’t accepted to the university she wanted and instead she was accepted in somewhere else that she really didn’t want to go. she’s in yerevan now and she goes to that uni but she hates that and she’s very sad. i want to make her happy. what to do? i’ll make nice surprises for her. i’ll send little presents to her without telling who am i. it’s easy! my neighbour studies in the same uni as Tatevik. i’ll send the presents with her. and also… i have her new address. i can go there and put some presents behind her door too. there’s one thing that i’m worried about. what if all those things scare her instead of making happy? i have to write also a careful and a nice letter. perhaps i’ll also think of some games for her so that she will have chances to find out who am i. yay! i love this idea! i love surprises. hope she’ll like it too.

i’m sorry lyov… i never forget my friends. sometimes happens that i’m so busy that i forget to miss them but i don’t forget them. it’s just i don’t feel time and distance when i’m busy. it’s like i’ve seen them yesterday.
well, i haven’t forgotten you. i saw you were online yesterday at about midnight. my mum was using the comp at that moment. i asked her to let me chat for 10 minutes. when she left the comp, about 20 minutes passed and you weren’t there. i was so tired so i didn’t wait (sorry!). i went straight to bed…
ooh, tired again. biochemistry and physiology for tomorrow. i need a little sleep before doing my homeworks… shit, and anatomy test for next week. isn’t it too early for tests?!

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